


Lignum Vitae

by Alisterscravat



Category: Gentleman Jack (TV)
Genre: Ann can't make up her mind, Anne is hot and sweaty, Anne wants to make out, Canon Universe, F/F, They both liked gardening so I tried to learn about plants and trees, blue dress Ann, god i love them
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-02
Updated: 2019-10-02
Packaged: 2020-11-22 03:08:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20867195
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alisterscravat/pseuds/Alisterscravat
Summary: Anne has been working with the men all day, absorbed by her thoughts of Miss Walker. She retreats to her favorite hideaway and receives an unexpected visitor.





	Lignum Vitae

**Author's Note:**

> I am so grateful for all the #AnneListerCodeBreaker's whose work transcribing Anne Lister's diaries inspired this short story. I often daydream about the Ann(e)'s finding little spots to be alone. I'm not sure if I will leave it as just one chapter or if I will add more. I suppose it depends on how much you like it or not! Let me know-and I hope you enjoy.

Anne Lister slid down the weed covered embankment, face covered in dirt after a long day of helping Pickles and his men in the garden. This was her most treasured spot to clear her head, the lengthy boughs shrouding her hideaway from the main road. Her long skirt wrapped around her legs awkwardly and she tugged at them as she picked up speed on her way down, brown hair coming loose and into her suntanned face. She reached the edge of the bank, cool water reflecting the long afternoon sun.

Her mind plodded back through the details of the day and her fingers twitched, eager to get back home to her journal to record it all. 25 Hollies,13 Junipers, 6 Weeping Cedars,2 Lignum Vitae, not to mention all the rest. She stretched her tired arms overhead, brushing a curl back from her face. The plan was to dress up the entrance road and so far it was coming along to her liking. She had sent Pickles back to Throp’s, down the old bank, a second time when things were looking too sparse. She was ultimately satisfied at the way it all came together, but she resolved to look with fresh eyes the next day. 

She toed the edge of the water with her leather boot and contemplated how wonderful it would feel to pull off her mud-speckled clothes and submerge her salty skin in the cool water. She reached in with her dirt-smudged hands and plopped down, working the debris from underneath her fingernails. The shade of the trees was a welcome reprieve, and she delighted in the earthy smell that hit her, as the smooth water glimmered. Her muscles began their familiar ache, her reward from her long walks and digging for hours. Her sister, Marian, would have no sympathy and would chastise her the moment she walked back inside, perpetually irritable that she was missing lunch for the day’s projects. She stretched her legs out and arched her toes back and forth as her thoughts drifted to Cliff Hill mansion and whether she ought to pass by later that evening. She didn’t want to seem too eager or overplay her cards.

She admired her hands in satisfaction and had just finished drying them off on her skirts when a familiar voice rang out over her shoulder. 

“Anne?”

Little Anne Walker stood atop the bank in rounded sleeves, flowers crowned around a woven hat, a small smile across her pretty pink lips. She picked up the patterned blue dress that surrounded her and carefully made her way down the hill. Anne pushed off of one knee and rushed to her side. Offering a clean, steady hand, Lister guided her to flatter ground. 

“Miss Walker.” Brown eyes met blue, Anne hovering just a few inches above the other. She pulled her shoulders back, lowering her voice as she tipped down slightly and into the space between them.

“I thought you were spending the day with your dear aunt?” She cocked an eyebrow playfully, impressed that Walker had found the hideout she had mentioned in passing during their conversations.

“Oh, my aunt grew weary this afternoon, as did I. We shared a delightful lunch and she read me a letter from a friend traveling abroad in Rome. You would have been utterly fascinated!” She exclaimed, turning her face to study Anne’s.

“Well, I will have to pay a call on your aunt in hopes she will share it with me!” Anne grinned, looking up and around them before stepping an inch closer. She noted the gold and amethyst ring delicately balanced on Miss Walker’s index finger as their hands hung at their sides properly, mere inches from touching. Ann’s breath hitched almost imperceptibly, a glimmer in her eyes.

“I’m sure she would love that, Anne.” She reached up to touch Anne’s cheek, brushing it with her thumb, lovingly. Anne closed her eyes, relishing in the feeling of the velvet fingers on her. She kept her own hands at her side, disbelieving that she was actually there. She had imagined bringing Ann to her alcove, but the reality was much better than the fantasy.

“You found me,” Anne smiled, looking around at their semi-private surroundings.

“You told me it was somewhere along the road with the yew tree, where the black poplar hangs overhead,” She gestured to the thick tree that hung above the embankment, its triangular leaves glossy in the afternoon light. “What a beautiful retreat. I can see why you like to come here.” She breathed, reaching out to touch a nearby leaf.

“Mm. I usually bring my journal when father and Marian are being particularly obnoxious. Today my mind is…full and I just needed to sort my thoughts.” She knocked at her head with her knuckles, watching as Ann turned and walked around, taking in the way the branches and leaves curled around to create a perfect safe harbor, set back from the water. Anne had found a few large rocks and placed them around while she was younger, desperate for solitude, making it the perfect spot for writing or just some peace. 

“I see you’ve been out digging in the garden again? I called at the hall but Marian said you’d been out with the men the entire day. She was a bit exasperated with you...” A smile pulled at her lips when Anne’s eyes rolled. Miss Walker was all too familiar with how often that exasperation occurred.

“Yes, Bottomley brought up soil to dress up the road along the garden wall and I had to ensure it was going as agreed,” Anne explained, waving a hand as the wind caught their hair and whipped at Ann’s puffy sleeves.

“Of course,” she agreed, dipping her head in a nod. “What needed sorting? You said you came to clear your head of…?” She let the sentence fall away, her clear eyes sparkling. 

“Ah.” Anne leaned back on her heels, considering how to proceed. She took a few steps into the retreat, pulling Ann along with her until the path to the embankment was out of view. “While the men and I were working, I noticed the Lignum Vitae. I enjoy the look of it with its dainty flowering petals, but it is so much more than that! It’s such a dynamic little tree. It has plenty of medicinal purposes, as well as wood that is apparently fantastic to carve with.” She relished the look of utter fascination that was spreading across Miss Walker’s face. They always enjoyed walking the gardens around Lightcliffe and challenging each other’s knowledge on the subject of gardening. 

“I was overwhelmed with the opinion that I had to plant the thing myself, and as I was placing it into the earth- I realized why I felt so drawn to it. The flowers, you know, are a beautiful blue color. Have you heard it referred to as ‘The Tree of Life’?” Anne questioned, cocking her head to one side. She loved watching the pink creep over her freckled cheeks, her white teeth biting down on her bottom lip as she broke eye contact.

“No, I was not aware. What drew you to it?” Ann gathered her courage and stepped a little closer. Anne reached out and ran a hand tenderly down the sleeve of her dress, the texture of the fabric familiar under her fingertips. 

“This is my favorite dress, you know. You wore it the last time we met in the chaumiere. It compliments your eyes and… it is such a distinctive color of blue.” Anne murmured, tugging at the edge of her patterned sleeve, eyes studying Miss Walker in an attempt to convey the depths of her feelings. “I can’t stop thinking about you, my beautiful Ann.” 

A smile spread across Ann’s lips, touching her eyes.

“Love is blind,” She smirked, looking out onto the water. Anne studied the woman’s profile in fascination- from the delicate bridge of her nose to the moon-curved chin. Lister couldn’t help but imagine leaning in to place a soft kiss on her mouth and how satisfying it would feel if she pressed her lips back, full of longing. She held back the urge. Just because they had kissed previously did not mean that Anne was going to forget propriety. She had to wait for the proper signals. Perhaps Miss Walker had come to say that she regretted the kisses in the chaumiere, the kisses in the drawing room, as well as the kisses in the garden. Anne licked her lips as the memories quickened her pulse.

The familiar sound of hooves galloping above them on the dirt road jolted her machinations. She swallowed them down as the rider passed by and instead motioned for Ann to sit, a little deeper into the hideaway. She helped Ann to smooth her skirts down around herself and watched as she reached up to undo the ribbon at her chin, pulling one end slowly. Anne reached for it as it came off and set it nearby, noticing the wincing look Ann tried to hide as she sat up straight.

“Is your spine still troubling you today?” Anne’s face was the picture of concern; she reached her hand out, gently placing it on Ann’s leg.

“I should be in bed,” Ann conceded, the lines tugging at her eyes as she turned back. “I hardly slept. I couldn’t stop thinking about…” She halted and her hands came together, twirling the gold band. Anne smiled to herself, silently eager to hear the girl to speak up. So, she hadn’t been the only one preoccupied today.

A particularly full birch tree shrouded them from view and Anne shifted to lean back on her elbows, a jagged piece of fallen white bark tossed away as Ann watched her get comfortable. 

“I couldn’t stop thinking about…you.” The last word came out in a whisper, and Anne felt a tingling sensation growing in her stomach, even as she tried to feign cool indifference.

“I know we said this... decision could wait until the third of April, but I’m curious what you’re feeling today,” Anne said tentatively, broaching the topic they were skirting around.

“I’m considering it all. Everything. I suppose I worry about rushing my decision because it is so important. I just have such tender feelings for you, Anne. When you kissed me…Well, I can’t stop thinking about how much I want to do that again,” Anne couldn’t help but study her pretty mouth as she spoke, hope rising in heart as Miss Walker gazed down at her. 

“But I have so many fears. Anne- they are keeping me awake at night and I pray that my mind will empty itself so that I can sleep. I feel horrible that I’ve let you kiss me again and again and yet I am no closer to a decision. I’m just so sure you will grow weary of me,” She sighed, gesturing to herself. “I’m nothing special.”

“Oh, Ann,” She said, lifting herself back up, noting that the appearance of indifference was not the way to Miss Walker’s heart. She swung her legs around and settled on her knees, taking Ann’s hands in her own. She watched as the tendons in Ann’s neck strained as she swallowed hard, looking as though she could be knocked over by a feather. Anne chose her words thoughtfully.

“I can’t dismiss your fears. You must weigh them carefully,” She squeezed her hands gently, watching her eyes darken in thought. “-but you needn’t be concerned with my commitment to you. Ann, you are clever and interesting. Honestly, I won’t stop agonizing until I know your answer,” She could practically see Ann’s heart swelling, her eyes brimming with hopeful tears.

“I want to kiss you again.” Anne whispered, her eyes locked onto Ann’s lips as they parted and inhaled a shaky breath. “-Even knowing that you are unsure about your decision.”  
“Really?” She asked, hesitantly. Anne had turned it over in her mind on many occasions, wondering how this woman could feel so low about herself. Anne Lister was the oddity around town, attracting extra-long stares from those who weren’t familiar with her way of dress and the briskness of her walk. She held her head up high, despite the murmurings, because she knew these poor, idiotic people hadn’t the first idea of being worldly. They were hardworking people, but most could hardly read their bible- let alone converse fluently in another language whilst living abroad. She wasn’t so odd any other place- any other place but home.

Ann Walker garnered far different attention and murmurings, ever since her brother died while on his honeymoon, quite tragically. Ann was the wealthiest unmarried woman for miles but with all of her various health issues, it was rare for her to be seen out and about. The town was curious and scrutinized her every move- hence little Miss Walker staying tucked inside the confines of Cliff Hill mansion. She had admitted her weakness of the spine to Anne recently, and it had become quite clear that Ann suffered with mental afflictions as well. She was also kind, well-read, had an appetite for Anne’s wild ideas, was independently wealthy, and looked at Anne in a way that drove her absolutely wild. 

“You know you’ll break my heart if you don’t say yes.” Her thumb ran across the plump pink of Ann’s lip and she rested her other on the hard shell of her waist, applying just the right amount of pressure to draw her closer. Ann melted like ice on a summer day under her touch and let her eyes flutter closed a few moments before Anne leaned in to kiss her. She skillfully checked the foliage around them before allowing herself be pulled into the moment.

Her lips parted and their mouths touched gently at first, soft and timid as they leaned into one another beneath the veil of woven, thick branches. Anne tightened her grip around Ann’s corseted waist and tilted her head, languishing in their long, slow kisses. Anne prided herself on her skill and expertise in kissing women, but little Miss Walker always surprised her with the tenderness and soft “Mm’s” that lit Anne’s heart up and made her press harder for more. 

She tasted like ripe clementines; Ann’s tongue tentatively reached out and met her own. They became more passionate then, aching to press every part of themselves into one another until they became one. Their kisses were deeper and breathing growing heavier as they clung to one another. Anne broke the kiss for just a moment to steal a glimpse at the beautiful woman, lips flushed and swollen against the backdrop of the verdant greenery. Her heart ached and she knew she was well in over her head, too far gone to pull back. She tilted her head the other way, lifting Ann’s chin up with her finger to place long, delicious kisses on her full bottom lip.

Anne was floating, her body tingling as Ann was pressing herself closer. She was delighting in the feel of Ann’s hands raking in her hair, imaging that she was the sun-parched earth and Ann the warm rain on a summer night. Ann moved her hands from her hair and cupped her face, letting a few “Mm’s” slip out as they kissed passionately. Anne knew she was too intoxicated by little Miss Walker to think straight when a gentle hand slapped her own. She had worked her way under the fabric of the pretty blue dress and Ann was smiling breathlessly against her.

“Not here,” She groaned against her mouth, pressing a few more open kisses back onto Anne. 

“I know, I know,” Anne relented sheepishly, resuming her assault on Ann’s bottom lip by pulling it in between her own and sucking gently. She felt her shudder and sigh as their last kisses grew smaller and softer. They leaned their foreheads together, both trying to catch their breath, as a flock of birds cawed overhead.

“We should get back,” Ann said softly, a tinge of sadness in her voice. Anne gave her a small, encouraging smile and wrapped her in a tender hug. 

“I thought about you all day. And now I’m going to think about you all night,” She murmured into her blonde hair. Ann ducked her head and smiled.

Anne leaned back and handed Miss Walker her flower-laced hat, hardly able to concentrate as she expertly retied the bow under her chin. Miss Lister reached out when she was done and placed kisses on each fingertip, eyes locked onto Ann’s as she did so. She pulled her in for one last, affectionate kiss before willing herself to stand up and offer her hand. Miss Walker carefully stood and they smoothed down the fabric, laughing as they found themselves picking away pieces of grass that had collected.

They made their way back up the embankment, hiking up their skirts until their shoes hit the dirt road.

“When can I see you again? Next time we should meet in the chaumiere,” Miss Lister suggested, brown eyes sparkling, each woman needing to go in the opposite direction.

“Tomorrow? After church?” Ann’s voice rang out like a bell, music to her ears. 

“Perfect,” Anne tilted her head, reaching out, their fingertips brushing. “I should have kissed you for longer.”

“You certainly should have. I’ll factor that into my decision-making.” She grinned playfully.

“I’ll make it up to you.” Anne shrugged nonchalantly, her eyebrows rising suggestively for just a moment.

“I’d expect nothing less,” Ann laughed, her ribbons dancing in the wind.

“Well. I will see you tomorrow, Miss Walker.” Anne tipped her head down in polite nod.

“Goodbye, Miss Lister,” Ann pulled back her hand, biting her lip as she turned away and began the quick trip home. 

Anne watched her blue dress sway as she walked away, pulling out her pocket watch as she faded from view. She cursed when she saw the time. Marian was going to kill her.


End file.
